I'm feeling a bit nostalgic today. Maybe it's because my life is about to be turned up-side-down in the next 24 hours. Maybe it's because the weather is changing (from hot, hot, HOT to downright cold near freezing or so it feels) and it reminds me of the changing of the seasons. Periodically, I like to look at old posts. By this I mean, I finish writing a post for the day and then I go 1 year back, 2 years back, 3 years back, etc. I have been known to go back 5 and 6 years to see what was going on in my life at the time.
What I've come to realize is that I used to write longer posts. Not only were they longer, but the content was not too shabby. I think in the past 3 years I have become extremely lazy in what I post - the content as well as the length. I also realize that I was not always so unhappy. Yes, I would say that I wasn't an ecstatic person, but I tended to see the funny things in everyday life and overall, I would say that I was happier than I am today. The past 3 years have become very heavy and UNfunny and have hated that.
I suppose it's because there are many topics that are relevant in my life right now that I don't want to talk about. They're topics that are very personal and since I know that "real" people that I know read what I write, I tend to be more careful about what I write. It's the reality of being found out. What draws me to other online journals that I read is the emotion and humanity of what the writer is going through. Lately, I've been contemplating ending Chicago Chick. I haven't made a final decision, but if you cannot be candid - within reason of course - then I see little point in keeping an online journal.