For the past 2 years, I have consistently attended Sunday mass. I think that it has to do with me getting older and realizing that I needed the comfort that mass brings me. It probably started about 3 years ago when a co-worker asked me to attend Ash Wednesday mass during lunch. For whatever reason, I decided to go and was happy when I entered the church, that the walls did not start to tumble down. Back then, the last time that I attended mass or walked into a church was probably over a decade ago. I was raised Catholic, but after I got married I stopped going.
During that particular Ash Wednesday mass 3 years ago, I suddenly felt very, VERY tired. It was almost like I had become so relaxed that I couldn't keep myself upright or keep my eyes open. There was a feeling of safety that I hadn't felt in years. Since then, I started attending mass on Sundays; it took me an entire year to go with any regularity. As a child, I always felt safe in church and that feeling continues. Well, it DID until today.
This afternoon my sons attended a mass where they were given the Light of Christ medal. I don't think that they realized how much work they did to earn the medals (probably 5 hours over the span of 4 to 5 weeks). The boys' dad brought them to church and they were 15 minutes late. Because I had their uniforms and changed in the church bathroom, they ended up being 20 minutes late. There was additional stress in the air because their dad proceeded to needle me about a drill that he needed and criticize the fact that I had forgotten their neckerchief. When the scout master handed me Nick and Alex's books that they had to complete in order to earn the Light of Christ medal, there was more tension.
The boys' dad decided that asking about the drill should be done during the beginning processional. I whispered that I didn't want to talk about the drill during mass. Then, during the first reading, the boys' dad decided that it was a good time to ask about the books that the boys had completed. He asked when the books were handed out and I whispered that now was not a good time but that I had told him about it (the scout master includes him on the emails that made reference to the books and the mass). That's when the boys' dad responded in a LOUD whisper, "You're a LIAR!" It was loud enough that the people in the pew in front of us turned around.
You'd think that it would have gotten better, but it got worse. The boys' dad decided to page through EACH page in the book during mass. The pages made a "flip, flip, flip" sound and the priest looked in our direction on more than one occasion. Once he was done with one book, he decided to hand it to me. When I wouldn't take it, he got mad and tried to shove it in my direction. I still wouldn't take it and he held on to it. I swear, it was the LONGEST 45 minutes of my life and any peace that I would have normally gotten from being in church was completely disrupted.
It's frustrating that someone who was supposedly raised Catholic cannot show respect during mass. It's more frustrating that someone who is supposed to be a role model to his children, cannot see that his behavior was not setting a good example for them. The boys were sitting in the pew across from where we were sitting and could see everything. I'm thinking that there will be many more times where we will be sitting in church together. I think it makes sense for us to NOT sit in the same pew or even talk to each other during mass going forward.
